My Heart

Of all the places that cover the land,
There is one I cherish and deem very grand
This place that I covet is just for me
Where I run when I am feeling lonely.

This place that I revere is mine alone, my little secret.
Sometimes I open it like a book so people can read it.
It’s foolish of me to leave myself so vulnerable to you,
But what you see inside is the side of me that’s true.

What you see is me without the facade
My true feelings and beliefs that are quite odd.
How I long to act this way always for you
I struggle to think how you would react too.

This place is my heart where I roam free.
No one to tell me that what I say cannot be.
It is a beautiful dwelling for my true self
Where the sorrow I feel is allowed to be felt.

I can cry in this home, away from my peers.
A nice cozy land where I can shed all my tears.
No men to fear in my calm land of great pain
Not one dreary reason to think of love again.

I weep here alone,
In silence, in my home.
The source of my darkness spills from my soul
My barricades are proofed for the smallest hole

No one comes in, yet nothing’s let out
It will hurt me in the end, there is no doubt.
But for now I am safe, behind my cold stonewalls
No men to mislead me, and second-guess my calls

The pungent smell of death lingers in the air
My soul killed by someone who never cared
The rough edges of my heart are now callused
It’s been punctured with feelings of malice.

Inside contains my joyous land
All aglow with a glee that’s so grand.
Here I am happy and never blue
Now I can dream that you love me too

In my world, there are iridescent flowers
And time isn’t counted, not even in hours
The soft sound of music dances in your ears
And the soft lyrics let you forget all your fears.

Your smile will be unceasing
Your happiness increasing
Just make sure you never hurt me
These are fragile walls, as you can see.

The softness of grass below my feet
And the way skin shimmers in the heat All of my pleasure will easily dissipate
If you ever fill me with anymore hate.

These walls are meant to keep hate out.
But they are failing and will soon give out.
I can see the black mist flowing through the cracks
My world is being submerged, no time to relax.

“Why?” I ponder as I glance upward to my brain.
It gives me an answer that brings even more pain.
“You have hurt me, as you said you would not”
Now my stomach is churning in harsh tight knots.

I want to be held now; I long to feel needed
I need that feeling, like I’ve finally succeeded
But alas, I receive nothing in my now barren prison
Not one reason for living or loving was given.

I tightly curl up as the darkness engulfs me
My treasured world is left in ruin I can now see.
I weep silently for the loss of my blissful paradise
Now my hardened heart has turn to nothing but ice

image

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s